Since the beginning I have ALWAYS been a perfectionist. ALWAYS. If everything isn't just right my heart races, my stomach churns, and my right eye twitches. I think it has something to do with my obsessive-compulsive, controlling personality. Whatever. As a result I usually strive for over-the-top all the time. Especially for birthdays.
I have been dating my prospective dating future (PDF) for about five unofficial weeks. So it's looking pretty good. Last Friday was his birthday. I wanted to make it REALLY special so he will keep liking me. I worked really hard on designing a crossword puzzle and with the help of this sweet site I was able to make a custom crossword. (PDF and I like to do crossword puzzles together, so I thought it would be awesome if I made a puzzle about him and I.) I also spent an entire afternoon writing a really nice letter in my best cursive handwriting and doodling stars all over. I even found the book he REALLY wanted at Barnes and Noble and wrapped it pretty with a big bow for him.
*It was perfect*
But then disaster struck at dinner...
I couldn't be happy with just the *perfect* present. I curled my hair fancy and wore my favorite black cotton dress from Banana Republic. Bee's black beaded flats and Momma's black shawl made the outfit perfect. At dinner we laughed, gushed over the good food, and cheered "Happy Birthday". Everything was going great. That's when the idea popped in my head. The idea that I THOUGHT would turn out wonderfully that ended blowing up in my face. In an effort to seem charming and funny and thoughtful I suggested that each person at the table share a favorite memory of PDF. Everyone thought this was a good idea and PDF's Mom went first.
The way I saw this playing out in my head was that each person would share a funny and possibly embarrassing story (not pooped your pants embarrassing, but fell down the stairs embarrassing) and everyone would laugh. But his Mom started telling the table about the very last time PDF addressed his group in drum core (yes, PDF is a band geek- one of the many qualities I am attracted to). It was so intense that she started to cry at the table.
AND THEN HE STARTED TEARING UP TOO.
This is one of those "all downhill from here" stories. Right after that his Dad talked about the very last inning he ever coached his little league team and how proud he was. His Dad started to get bleary-eyed. In an instant we had gone from a cheery, excited setting to crying over a few coming of age tales. PDF's BFF looked across the table at me like I was a complete moron for making the parents, grandma, and the birthday boy cry. Thankfully he pulled out a hilarious story (one I was hoping everyone would share) and salvaged part of the evening.
I was last to go, and instead of being able to tell the cute story I had rehearsed in my head I was so nervous I ended up stammering something about eating my burned food. LAME. In an effort to to be cute and fun I only portrayed myself as a weird-o, birthday ruiner.
Needless to say I've been nauseated ever since.
I hope you are better at impressing possible future in-laws.
1 comment:
Actually......you made it the most memorable birthday to date. Everything was going fine until the "game" then, things got emotional. It was not a bad thing to hear my family tell me how much they love me, in fact it was very reassuring. So your title could not be more incorrect. I wish you would have titled it, a heartfelt display of maternal and paternal love, but its ok. :) And now im going to make you tell me the real story you had in your mind. You are the most amazingly beautiful, funniest girl i've met in college or before and would give anything to be with you all the time
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