mistletoe for one

Hello my name is Aimee and this is a Christmas adventure...

Cheery songs are on the radio, twinkly lights brighten up Mill Avenue, and somewhere in the background I am certain I can hear jingle bells. For it is Christmastime, the most romantic time of the year.

I can't help but get caught up in the jewelry commercials and Mariah Carey's ever popular, "All I want for Christmas Is You". Then it suddenly dawns on me: this year I am single for Christmas. I am committing the second ultimate sin according to my old fashioned family right behind going stag to a wedding (which I did in March. I thought my cousin was going to have a heart attack.)

As I struggle with the idea of not being kissed underneath the mistletoe on Christmas Eve, I assure myself that I cannot be the only single girl for Christmas. But where are all the other head strong women walking through December without holding someone's hand? Movies and music tell us true love will find you on Christmas, even the ten year olds in the JC Penny commercial have someone for Christ sake.

I did a little research on the topic and to my dismay I found that not only will my family spend the holiday's pitying individuals like myself, but that society in general does not approve of the declaration of freedom from a man. Articles such as How to Survive Being Single at Christmas from eHow list ideas for ways single people to spend the holidays. Not only are we single, but now we don't have any friends or families to spend the holidays with? A single person's guide to surviving Christmas: The bar-room bloke is an article that warns men of becoming too intoxicated and hooking up with desperate, not-so-good looking, crazy, single girls at the office.

I have been shamed by 5th graders, cast off by my close friends and relatives, and degraded by the other single individuals at the office. I cannot rationalize the thought of my self worth melting away simply because I am not half of something.

I am taking a stand.

For all the widows, divorced women, and single college girls:

Yes, we may appreciate the help of a man when atop the roof hanging lights, cutting down trees in 20 degree weather, and retrieving heavy boxes full of decorations from the attic. We are allowed to sigh at cheesy commercials, sad Christmas songs, and invitations to holiday parties of which we will attend alone. We can secretly wish for a boy to hold hands and gaze at lights with, that special someone to kiss beneath the mistletoe, and a significant other to wake up next to on Christmas morning. However, it does not mean we are less of a person because of these things. Hold your head high, ladies. While men may add to our lives, they do not define them. Many of us have already done more deeds of bravery than simply facing our families alone during the holidays.

While others look upon us shamefully or try to set us up with their weird estranged cousin Ed, I recall wise words from Marge Piercy, “A strong woman is a woman determined to do something others are determined not be done.”

I'm wishing you all a happy holiday season from beneath the mistletoe alone.