Sunday, May 27, 2012

scary movie

By nature I'm not a scary movie type of person, the suspense in the movie the Davinci Code is enough to keep me on the edge of my seat and my mind wandering long after I should be in dreamland. I have however been victim of cheesy horror film re-runs on TNT when visiting my Dad. They ALWAYS have a scene where the girl is running from the uber creepy guy and can't start the getaway car in time because she has the wrong set of keys, a weird alarm system, so on and so forth. In  my head I'm thinking "yeah right, in real life you would just start the car and drive away and that would be the end of the movie". Then I'm usually annoyed by the ridiculous plot line.

This last week my Dad was out of town and dropping him at the airport left me in possession of the big white truck he drives. It was awesome, I was ramping curbs and taking turns so wide I felt I was in a semi. Late one night I was on my way out to visit my sisters, racking my brain for a clever nick name to be used on a CB system when I realized I could be the star of a horror movie. The keychain my Dad had left me had four small keys looped on it. Two of these keys were GMC and the others looked like they opened front doors and office cabinets. My arms were loaded down with an overnight bag, my blue Nalgene bottle, my shoulder bag, and my cell phone. I carefully chose the square GMC key and shoved it in the lock. No dice. I reassessed and tried the round one. Bingo.

Note to self: This seemed really weird because my GMC automobile is opened with a square key (the round one is only used for the trunk).

So I haul myself and my belongings into the cab of the truck and stick the round key in the ignition. The car won't start. I pull the keys back out tried the square key to start up the massive engine. After a bit of turning, the truck roars to life.

 I have flashes of myself in a dimly lit WalMart parking lot at 2:30am being mugged/raped/having someone taking a photo of me and posting it on people of WalMart all because I can't remember which flipping key opens and which one starts the white monster truck.

My life theory about scary movies was quickly disproved and left me feeling all too vulnerable. I considered the options and risks and decided to drive the hunk-of-gleaming-white-junk to my Moms. Besides, my car doesn't have air conditioning and going down tragically in a website post is not near as bad as sweating.

i hope your imagination is used on more productive thoughts.

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